I’m just gonna leave this here.

To read Dead Man’s Diaries in chronological order please click here. I am done, I have finished this blog. I have honoured my brother. I think, I hope he’d be pleased. My brother is gone, our mother has Alzheimer’s, there is no one to confirm all my memories, but there is this – our love and lives on paper. I miss him, I miss receiving … Continue reading I’m just gonna leave this here.

J’s last letter.

This is deeply personal and I’ve thought about this from the day I started this blog. I have shared openly and honestly our thoughts, lives and letters and yet I’ve considered keeping this one last letter private. I have decided to share only parts of it, others parts of it I will keep to myself. As J himself wrote parts of this letter are “flippant and … Continue reading J’s last letter.

I think I like being out of debt for a change.

J’s Diary Entry 13 April 2003 God, has been ages since I wrote in  here. OK, will resort to point form: have been interviewing potential housemates, am in line for a $1,200 bonus from work Jade has quit her job and appears to be on the verge of a depressive breakdown; and got my short story published in Melbourne Times I think that’s all the … Continue reading I think I like being out of debt for a change.

Shut your mouth you Goddamn rent dodging, rice eating turkey.

J’s Diary Entry 6 January 2003 After another day, chasing myself around the inner suburbs watching films, I came home, then ran out again (to Bunnings, for more, ever more DIY supplies). I arrived home late-ish. Jade was here, cooking a chicken stir fry. Ian The Turkey was in his room, as always. Jade and I went out after dinner to ‘Grandma Funks’ (UGH! That … Continue reading Shut your mouth you Goddamn rent dodging, rice eating turkey.

Mum’s Cancer = get out of stuff ya don’t wanna do.

J’s Diary Entry 16 November 2001 Well! What excitement!  Dull day at work.  Got home with an armful of junk food, five videos and a strong dose of misanthropy. Jade begged me to go out to seek drinks with her but I steadfastly refused. Then Paige asked me to go for a bike ride with her (it was a beautiful evening), again I stuck to … Continue reading Mum’s Cancer = get out of stuff ya don’t wanna do.

Word of the day; Elegy.

J’s Diary Entry 15 October 2001 Only threw up once today, though thought about it two other times. Applied for a week’s holiday and started taking Aropax again.  It doesn’t seem to be working too well – still having obsessive thoughts and throwing up.  Ate two Milky Bars at work and liberated them 10 minutes later.  I’ll be thin, but toothless. Jade is in the … Continue reading Word of the day; Elegy.

Grains of thanks – small, important things.

Fri 19 Mar 1999 – Queensland (for Aunty Tia’s 50th) Today I give thanks; That I truly understood and felt my mothers’ need for and lack of self esteem For my little girl with her sweet heart and good manners For identifying my need to learn patience That I miss Barry   Sat 20 Mar 1999 – Queensland Today I give thanks; For being able to … Continue reading Grains of thanks – small, important things.