How typical of me to be looking for maggots in the banquet.

J’s Diary Entry 9 January 2003 9.30am  –  I just realised something about all my New Year’s Resolutions – I’m in one of my disciplined phases. I’m eating well, exercising, concerned about work, being sociable, active. This always make it easier to stick to things, but… what about when it’s over? What will I do when the ennui comes back, with it’s sidekick, Lazybones? How … Continue reading How typical of me to be looking for maggots in the banquet.

Bad Parties, Bad TV and Bad Religion.

From: ‘J’ Date: 20 May 2002 05:30AM To: ‘S’ Subject: Bad Party…Bad TV…and Bad Religion Hey Sis.  How was your weekend?  Mine was alright. Went to IT guy from work’s 30th birthday dinner on Saturday night in St Kilda. Since his parents are winey (they have a vineyard and all) there was free wine, four varieties. I thought “You rippa – bring on the dancing … Continue reading Bad Parties, Bad TV and Bad Religion.

I can’t wait to hear everyone missed me.

J’s Diary Entry 5 November 2001 Bit of a shopping day today.  Got up late-ish, still a bit sick but trying valiantly to eat my way to wellness.  After watching Springer (“I’m here to fulfil my Secret Lesbian Fantasy”) Jen, Jade and I walked down to Chapel Street and did some window shopping (which I’ve always considered kind of pointless – why tease yourself?) and … Continue reading I can’t wait to hear everyone missed me.

We moved to Barbados and hang out with Sade, Mick Hucknall and date faded tennis stars.

From: ‘J’ Date: 17 July 2001 2:11AM (AUSTRALIAN Time) To: ‘S’ Subject: The Tightest Pants in Bendigo hygienically sealed, of course. The Chronicles of J continue.. Oooh la la! I had a GREAT weekend (don’t get too excited – still dry sheets in the Richmond House of No-Sex). Went to that wedding that I was bitching and moaning about and had a really good time. I … Continue reading We moved to Barbados and hang out with Sade, Mick Hucknall and date faded tennis stars.

I’d like to plop my brain into a fish bowl and place it on a window ledge somewhere.

  From: ‘J’ Date: 03 May 2001 12:37AM To: ‘S’ Subject: Transvestites and tranquillisers   Hey Sis. What’s up?  Me, I’m getting out more now that Paige’s moved out. Can’t just sit around and wait to be entertained, goddammit.  So I went to Fitzroy on the weekend, watched a sextagenarian transvestite with an ostrich feather in her hair do the mambo to a 60’s cover band whilst … Continue reading I’d like to plop my brain into a fish bowl and place it on a window ledge somewhere.

Gratitude for something I wrote down 17 years ago.

March 1999 Brady and I flew to Australia for a holiday and to celebrate my Aunty Tia’s (my mothers only sister) 50th birthday.  We stayed in Melbourne with my Mum and Winky,  and we all flew to Queensland for the big birthday party, it was a lovely time. It was warm, there was swimming, family, memories shared and made, lots of laughter – my Aunty … Continue reading Gratitude for something I wrote down 17 years ago.

And as for the apples, well they got cooked right there on the tree.

27 January 1999 Dear S and Brady, Pop said to say thank you very much for the video “Fawlty Towers” we all enjoyed it very much, he had a nice birthday and he really enjoyed all the phone calls, was lovely to speak to you and Brady.  J has been up here to see us too, gee it was lovely to see him.  Pop is … Continue reading And as for the apples, well they got cooked right there on the tree.

So Bett Won a Betting Competition.

Tuesday, 3 Mar 1998 Stayed at Mum’s in “Poo Town” last night – trip to the dentist this morning.  Root canal on a pre-molar, upper left quadrant.  Fucking painful.  Even popped a tranquilizer before I left – no bloody effect at all.  Gonna neck half a dozen of the bastards next time. Got into work to be confronted with the galling aspect of Bett being … Continue reading So Bett Won a Betting Competition.

Before Hipsters were Hipsters.

Found amongst J’s correspondence. He has typed it on his typewriter.  I’m not sure if it is a Diary entry or if it was meant to be a letter, to me or someone else.  I know I never received it.  Think this may belong in the UNSENT file.   What:  Paige’s Party When:  Friday, 18 October 1996 Who was there:  Me, Tariq, Simon, Jeremy, Lisa, Darren, … Continue reading Before Hipsters were Hipsters.

If I’d taken the time to get to know her before going out with her, I never would have gone out with her.

Sunday, 8 September 1996  12:02pm Hey Sis, I’m in on the weekend, I feel so righteous.  I was in yesterday too.  Perhaps that’s why I slept so well last night – sleep of the righteous and all that. Tram Anecdote No. 643. Came in on the 11:26 tram.  Sat next to – well, adjacent to if you want to be precise – some guy with … Continue reading If I’d taken the time to get to know her before going out with her, I never would have gone out with her.