Wish I knew Shakespeare, this seems to be the right moment for a quote. 

J’s Diary Entry 11 January 2003 I rode to Leah’s in 15 minutes! I am a FUCKING athlete is wot I am, mate. I must get around and see Leah more often, she’s such good value. It’ll be damn weird if/when she has a kid/kids. I think even Jade is canvassing motherhood as an option! Where will I live? I don’t think I could share … Continue reading Wish I knew Shakespeare, this seems to be the right moment for a quote. 

Starting to feel the poison of remorse in my heart.

From: J Sent: 19 November 2002 10:44PM To: S Subject: Starting to feel the poison of remorse in my heart. Hey Sis — got the Spy Ear thingy this morning and can’t stop rubbing my thighs together with GLEE! (It makes a sound at a frequency that only other homos can hear — is the Sissy Song of Joy.) Now I have to wait until lunchtime … Continue reading Starting to feel the poison of remorse in my heart.

I’ll swap you a kidney for some teeth.

From: S Sent: 04 November 2002 2:49PM To: J Subject: Dick called ‘oh MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   (in my best Janice voice). If he bags you one more time for not calling him, I told him off saying that he was in the middle of the bush on a dodgy mobile for god sake – how is anyone meant to call him! He says that last time … Continue reading I’ll swap you a kidney for some teeth.

It’s great being part of a minority – you get to cruelly shock people and still feel persecuted and demand special privileges.

—–Original Message—– From: S Sent: Thursday, October  10, 2002 6:31 PM To: J Subject: You Gotta Laugh Mum asked if I heard from Dad on my birthday, I said ‘Yes’, and told her that he had his usual whinge at me that he hasn’t spoken to you in ages. The rest of the conversation went like this ‘Then you don’t think J has told him?’ … Continue reading It’s great being part of a minority – you get to cruelly shock people and still feel persecuted and demand special privileges.

I’m just going to slip back into my chastity belt.

  From S Date: Wednesday, October 09, 220 06:15 To: J Subject: DSCN 1 973.JPG;DSCN 1 975.JPG;DSCN 1 968.JPG;DSCN 1 970.JPG Some pics of your nieces for you.     From J Date: 10 October 2002 12:36 To: S Subject: Self-obsessed Hey – I was talking about Brownies just yesterday! I was saying to my co-workers that I’m sure there’s something in Brownies where they … Continue reading I’m just going to slip back into my chastity belt.

Four days til pay day…

From: J Sent: 14 October  2002  12:42 AM To: S Subject: Bali Bombings Two friends of mine are in Bali. They’re OK, they didn’t go out that night, but they’d been to that bar before. Spooky eh? Looks like 75% of the casualties are Australian. Australia’s suburban football teams will have been almost totally wiped out. Shouldn’t joke really, I saw some footage of people in … Continue reading Four days til pay day…

I just don’t believe that the hair in one’s ears should exceed in length the hair on one’s head.

From: S Date: 20 August 2002 05:30 To: J Subject: J I didn’t give Mum the letter I was just too too scared, really I am. But I do want to mail it. Oh fuck it, I don’t know what to do. I sent a tentative letter to Aunty Tia asking how she found mum when she was up there recently and I scantily touched on … Continue reading I just don’t believe that the hair in one’s ears should exceed in length the hair on one’s head.