This reticence of mine, is a vegetarianism of the soul.

Friday 28 June 1996  8:40am We’re having a food-scare here at the moment Sis.  It’s not quite up to your UK Mad Cow fiasco.  There’s this massive crop of peanuts that had Salmonella in it.  Now almost every single jar of peanut butter in Australia has been recalled.  There’s been over fifty cases of food poisoning.  Slater & Gordon (this really opportunistic law firm) has been advertising … Continue reading This reticence of mine, is a vegetarianism of the soul.

I feel like floating up and never coming back, maybe I could take up a career as a cloud or something.

The next letter I received from J was dated from 4/9/95 to 27/9/95 it was 23 pages long and just over 10,000 words, he named it “The Monster Letter”.  I have broken it down into days for posting here.   Monday, 4 September 1995  9:18 AM S, Oh God. God God God. How do I begin this one?  Maybe with a swig from the neck … Continue reading I feel like floating up and never coming back, maybe I could take up a career as a cloud or something.

There’s never a black horse around when you need one.

J’s Diary Entry Friday, 26 May 1995 Whooh! Friday night drinks are getting out of control.  It started at “Klicks”.  I was feeling slightly off-colour after a lunch of quiche and was in two minds about going.  I went anyway.  Being concerned about the state of my teeth, I drank neat shots of vodka to avoid sugary mixers. A mistake.  Because there wasn’t much to them, … Continue reading There’s never a black horse around when you need one.

Lying is essential to fit in with society on that all-important superficial level. People really only want lip service.

J’s Diary Entries Saturday, 7 Jan, 1995 Spent the whole day getting this juggling thing down pat. I can do it for about a minute now, though I’m sure my next door neighbour must be sick of the sound of my balls thudding to the floor every minute or so. Moped around the house being annoyed at myself for spending all that money on booze last … Continue reading Lying is essential to fit in with society on that all-important superficial level. People really only want lip service.

1 Jan 1995 – Happy New Year, now where is the vodka.

J kept a diary for most of 1995.  Having read all our correspondence and his diaries in chronological order, 1995 seems like a pivotal year for his thinking and the many changes and choices he makes.   Sun 1 Jan 1995 – Well, well, how exciting! A new diary. I’ve been dying to use it for the last few weeks, last year’s was simply too small … Continue reading 1 Jan 1995 – Happy New Year, now where is the vodka.

The check-out chick really liked a joke I made about Gatorade being bottled sweat. Made me feel good for an hour.

J’s Diary Entries Dec 1994 Tue 27 Dec – Got pissed, watched videos. Wed 28 Dec – Got pissed, watched videos. Thurs 29 Dec – Got pissed, watched videos then went with Brett and Lara to Punter’s Club to see Sam (from our School Days) band play. The band was good but I didn’t feel like chatting to Sam so I pretended not to see … Continue reading The check-out chick really liked a joke I made about Gatorade being bottled sweat. Made me feel good for an hour.

I hired a few videos, bought a bottle of vodka, thus shall I while away the Christmas hours.

Fri 23 Dec 1994 – Work Break-Up Day, I didn’t handle myself terribly well. In my headlong determined rush to have a good time, I drank too much, hoping to set an example for my fellow reticent revelers. Fuck they’re a boring bunch. So young and earnest and mature – controlled. DULL!! At least Caleb liked his present.  I got a “CANDOM” from Quinn. It’s … Continue reading I hired a few videos, bought a bottle of vodka, thus shall I while away the Christmas hours.