J’s Diary Entries Dec 1994

Tue 27 Dec – Got pissed, watched videos.

Wed 28 Dec – Got pissed, watched videos.

Thurs 29 Dec – Got pissed, watched videos then went with Brett and Lara to Punter’s Club to see Sam (from our School Days) band play. The band was good but I didn’t feel like chatting to Sam so I pretended not to see him. Brett and I spoke deeply on the way home. He and Lara are moving in together soon. He’s feeling torn between his higher and lower function desires. Practically it’s a very good move for him, sexual freedom wise, not so good a move. He’s always digging holes for himself, justifying and rationalising at full tilt the whole way. I probably do the same.

I felt, sometimes, acutely uncomfortable at the Club. Some people seemed so damn hostile. I wonder if it’s just me? Whether I’m more sensitive to hostility, or just exaggerate it. Perhaps I’m projecting the fear of my own potential for violence onto others. Yes, Cav would like that last idea. He’s firmly convinced that a Nazi SS Officer’s heart beats slowly in my chest.

Fri 30 Dec – I pottered around, cleaned up, had a shower and watched my last video “Cal” which was OK. Josh picked me up in his Dad’s Valiant, this enormous white monster which drifts across the road. We got to his place and checked out his plants, which are really short but dense. Then watched a Woody Allen film “Sleeper”. We had vodka and stir-fry with capers, whatever capers are, and I slept in the spare room with the plants.

Oh yeah I made a friend at Josh’s Supermarket, this check-out chick really liked a joke I made about Gatorade being bottled sweat. Made me feel good for an hour.

Sat 31 Dec – Woke up ridiculously early at Josh’s and watched “Reservoir Dogs”. Then we went down to Bay Street for Fish ‘n Chips. Then Josh took me home because he had to pick up an old washing machine and then get home to go out for New Years Eve. Josh invited me (perhaps reluctantly, I’m not sure) but I declined, as he expected me to.

Filled the rest of the evening up with TV until retiring at 11PM.

Happy New Year.