I’ll swap you a kidney for some teeth.

From: S Sent: 04 November 2002 2:49PM To: J Subject: Dick called ‘oh MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   (in my best Janice voice). If he bags you one more time for not calling him, I told him off saying that he was in the middle of the bush on a dodgy mobile for god sake – how is anyone meant to call him! He says that last time … Continue reading I’ll swap you a kidney for some teeth.

Do you like apples or pears? And why?

  —–Original Message—– From: S Sent: Monday, October 28, 2002 10:38PM To: J Subject: Just asking?   When did you first know/think you were gay?    Honestly….   From: J Sent: 28 October 2002 10:16PM To: S Subject: Re: Just asking?   Let’s see, when did I first know? Well, there was always the bizzo of playing with the girls at primary school. Definitely had … Continue reading Do you like apples or pears? And why?

Full-body chemical skin peels and a home perm.

  From: J Sent: 25 October 2002  12:33AM To: S Subject: volcanic lovemaking powers…(Yawn.) S Hey, guess what? I have a date tonight, a hot date with Steven from Pooftas Anon. At a restaurant near his place. VERY near his place, heh heh heh. We’ve already had a bit of a pash –  had a date earlier this week.  No sex, but a bit of a … Continue reading Full-body chemical skin peels and a home perm.

What sort of a person goes on other people’s dates? I’ll tell you, THE DEVIL, that’s who.

From: J Sent: 18 October 2002 5:57AM To: S Subject: I am the Devil Ah S, I am the DEVIL! I am Satan HIMSELF! Alright, you know how I went to that Pooftas Anonymous thing, right? Well, you know how I had a few admirers from that: Lance – creepy older guy, Bruno – another creepy guy and Jean-Jacques, the rather sweet Mauritian guy. Remember … Continue reading What sort of a person goes on other people’s dates? I’ll tell you, THE DEVIL, that’s who.

It’s great being part of a minority – you get to cruelly shock people and still feel persecuted and demand special privileges.

—–Original Message—– From: S Sent: Thursday, October  10, 2002 6:31 PM To: J Subject: You Gotta Laugh Mum asked if I heard from Dad on my birthday, I said ‘Yes’, and told her that he had his usual whinge at me that he hasn’t spoken to you in ages. The rest of the conversation went like this ‘Then you don’t think J has told him?’ … Continue reading It’s great being part of a minority – you get to cruelly shock people and still feel persecuted and demand special privileges.

I’m just going to slip back into my chastity belt.

  From S Date: Wednesday, October 09, 220 06:15 To: J Subject: DSCN 1 973.JPG;DSCN 1 975.JPG;DSCN 1 968.JPG;DSCN 1 970.JPG Some pics of your nieces for you.     From J Date: 10 October 2002 12:36 To: S Subject: Self-obsessed Hey – I was talking about Brownies just yesterday! I was saying to my co-workers that I’m sure there’s something in Brownies where they … Continue reading I’m just going to slip back into my chastity belt.

Four days til pay day…

From: J Sent: 14 October  2002  12:42 AM To: S Subject: Bali Bombings Two friends of mine are in Bali. They’re OK, they didn’t go out that night, but they’d been to that bar before. Spooky eh? Looks like 75% of the casualties are Australian. Australia’s suburban football teams will have been almost totally wiped out. Shouldn’t joke really, I saw some footage of people in … Continue reading Four days til pay day…