Tuesday, 3 September 1996 Helloooooooooooooooooooo J apoos How are you my darling? I am so lazy I never write to you and now that I am I have nothing to say, I tell you everything when I ring. Heard you had dinner with Dad on Sunday for Father’s Day. Mum told me all about his embarrassing shenanigans at the restaurant, what a hoot. … Continue reading Oh God the depths I’ve sunk to in my mortgaged up mediocre life.
Friday, 23 August 1996 4:21pm Hey Sis, I know I’ve only got half an hour to go, but I’ve ground to this terrible halt. I can barely hold my head up, you know? You’re not really tired, you’re just tired of what you’re doing. I don’t feel bad anyway, I did stay back until 6:30 last night. I’m going to skip Friday drinks again tonight. … Continue reading I’m going to activate my favourite plan of (in)action.
Tuesday, 24 June 1996 2:50am Gee it felt good not to drink Sis. So righteous, so in control. I liked it so much, that I did it again on Friday night. Actually, everyone took it rather quietly, except Erin’s boyfriend, Billy. He got pissed. I think that getting pissed myself all the time has blinded me to the jibes that people make. Sometimes I wonder … Continue reading So we eat Ox Tail and Ox Tongue – but what do we do with the rest of the Ox?
Wednesday, 5 June 1996 8:35am Hey S, Had that lunch with our Father yesterday. Depressing affair, all told. Basically, these ideas of going back to Uni are shot, they really are. It’s the people I work with, they’re always going on and on and on about how crap it is here, so I guess I’m conditioned to think that. Then they all go on about … Continue reading Maybe I’ll just skip the University course and make myself homeless now.
J letter to S Monday, 6 November 1995 12:11 PM God crappy-crappy, fuck-fuck. Shit mood Sis. Shit mood. Wanna go home and crawl under my doona. It’s one of those rainy days that are ripe for video watching and that’s about it. I hate this job, I just can’t bring myself to look at these pages of proof anymore, it’s a bit of a concern … Continue reading I have no rich spirituality with which to comfort myself, I need money. It’s the only religion I have.
Thursday, 2 November 1995 4:28pm Howdy Sis, Dad just came in and met me for lunch. We had bagels in Collins Place. He asked me what “baggles” were. I talked him into trying one. He went for the Hawaiian. I think he wants to make this lunching a regular thing, which worries me a bit. I don’t know if I can come up with half … Continue reading It’s the type of voice that sours milk, makes fruit fall from the trees, send a babe-in-arms cross-eyed.
J’s Diary Entry Tuesday, 26 September 1995 Simon leaves in 5 days. God I’ll miss him. I wish I could go too. I tell him how ace it’s going to be and how much sex he’s going to have. He gets all excited just like a kid. I hope he has a great time in Europe. Watched a documentary on Bongs tonight – quite frightening. … Continue reading I mean, if I get cancer, I die, no problem, but brain damage, that’s serious.
Friday, 22 September 1995 9:10AM Woke up late, feeling groggy, still do as a matter of fact. Read more of that Sartre last night, and it’s provoking some self-examination that I think I probably would’ve been better off without. I suppose I should explain – this book “The Age of Reason” is sort of filled with this feeling of expectancy, a hesitancy and fear of … Continue reading It’s as if I’m standing in the middle of life as a time-line, and I’m wondering which is more important to who I am? My future or my past?
J’s Diary Entry Friday, 15 September 1995 I was walking down Puckle Street, looking at couples strolling as I strode (only single people stride) and thought “How come they can manage it and I can’t? and then I got depressed, then realised that getting depressed so quickly is the reason I can’t manage what they can, which was depressing in itself. It’s weird, Dad said … Continue reading I wish I could be happy with less.
Thursday, 14 September 1995 9:24PM Wow, I can’t believe it’s September S. In a work context, this year seems to have snuck past when I was in the tea room, though I can’t recall what I did for New Year’s Eve at all. That’s a bit of a concern. I really can’t remember what I did. I just asked Simon. He said I did nothing, at … Continue reading In a work context, this year seems to have snuck past while I was in the tea room.
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