Christmas was shit. Mum’s got cancer and I’m fat again.

From:   'S'
Date:    07 January 2002 08:05AM
To:     'J'
Subject: You back yet?

I feel really bad, but I had such trouble talking to Mum after she told me about her cancer, it took me nearly a week to call her back, no doubt she told you.  I don’t really know why, just found I couldn’t pick up the phone and call her.  Anyway she phoned me at work and we spoke, but I still have trouble, probably pretending it isn’t happening or something. She seems great and she will be fine I know.

She couldn’t have been any clearer the way she kept spitting out over and over “I don’t need you, don’t you dare come over, I don’t need your help, I mean it S.” she was so goddamn emphatic, maybe that’s why I didn’t call her, who knows.

Can you please email me your new work number, don’t panic I am not going to do a Dick and call every day but would just like to have it in case I do want to call you there.

So you back at work yet?



From:   'J'
Date:    07 January 2002 09:55PM
To:     'S'
Subject: You back yet?

I wish I could say I knew what you meant, but you see I’m a morbid fucker, and I think about people being dead all the time so I guess it didn’t hit me so hard.  Nothing does, really.  That’s the great advantage of being dead inside! Maybe I should pen a self-help novel along these lines. “Zombies Have More Fun!”

Ma really does seem to be OK though. I’ve been call her every second day or so.  And she finally had her day in court with that school thing.  Please GOD let this be the end of it, I think she got some closure out of it.  She got to slag off that Bob bloke and look him in the eye while she did it.

Yes, came back in yesterday – took nearly a whole day to sort through my emails and voice mail but here I am, back on top of things, and I seem to have passed my Drongo Hex onto another staff member (they stuffed something up in half the time it takes me) so I’m safe for a bit.

Did you have a good break?

My new work number is X 555 XX2X


From:   'S'
Date:    07 January 2002 09:30PM (UK time)
To:     'J'
Subject: You back yet?

I worked thank God and left Barry with the kids, which is another email altogether, that they lived is nothing short of a miracle!

How was your break?

Love ya



From:   'J'
Date:    08 January 2002  10:23AM  
To:     'S'
Subject: You back yet?

Yeah, it wasn’t bad, I managed to put on about 5 kilos and am now tipping the scales (if not crushing them)  at a mighty 87 kilos, which is a good 8 kilos outside the “healthy  weight range”.  So I’m walking to and from work every day (well, the last two days that is) which adds up to two hours walking a day and I’m making my lunch and dinner every day from now on, which should save me money as well. Ah, I am so broke! Listen to me, what a moaner! Anyone would think I’d made new year’s resolutions, which I didn’t. Well, not really. Every year I have the same vague notions of improving my appearance/fitness, finances, general life competence  but every year turns out the same so the urge to improve is slowly diminishing with each year and soon I predict that I’ll lose the will to live altogether. Zara, my co-worker, just told me that she thought her boobs had grown because they were rubbing on her arms, but now she thinks it’s the muscles in her arms cos she’s doing body combat classes.

So how was work without Barry? Did you miss the kiddies? How was your Christmas? Mine was alright, tho Mum pulled a shifty in the present department. She bought me an awful shirt and then I was obliged to wear it to the Green’s for lunch. And of course Damian and William and all the other people there were dressed like normal people and there I was in a shirt that made me look like Dad. Shifty, eh? I shouldn’t complain tho, she did give me a nice Polaroid camera.

Being back at work isn’t as bad as I expected. Half the company has moved upstairs now and it’s half deserted down here, it’s nice, like it’s on holiday skeleton staff even tho their all here somewhere or other. And there was good gossip from the office Christmas party (I know of at least one office coupling). Was there any goss from yours? How did it all go in the end? I didn’t even go to mine (even after all the time spent organising it – just went to the pub afterwards. Can’t stand the speeches.

Honestly Sis, don’t worry about Ma, she’ll outlive both of us.

Gotta go.






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