I’m really not sure if I’m doing this properly, I understand people maybe don’t comment on the writing as it has already been written by my brother. It’s not possible to ‘tweak’ the story line as such, it is what it is, and unfortunately set in stone. I don’t know if anyone is reading this from beginning in order or if people are just reading them as and when they pop up with a tag that resonates with them. I guess without reading the ABOUT Page it may not make sense to people.
It is my hope that people take the journey, start at the start and hopefully see themes, threads developing, family interactions that I may not have seen being too close to the picture, a nuance I may have missed, a perspective I haven’t applied –I’m seeking your interpretations of our interactions, your comparable experiences and advice from siblings of suicide, children of depressed parents, anyone.
I took my time to put all our correspondence in order and am posting from 1991 to 2004, when my brother died. I have come across a number of letters J wrote to me but never sent – I have decided that I will include these marked as NOT SENT, there must be a reason he didn’t send them. I am also posting J’s drawings attached to the relevant letter and am gradually listing his library of books on GoodReads – link to the right of the page – I am assuming I’m doing it properly and that the links are working. Being technically challenged I am happy to receive any advice on my layout, posting frequency, links etc.
I am hoping that readers can help me to understand my family, and view us from alternative perspectives. I also hope that if people read it in order and see the development of J’s depression and anhedonia that they may recognise it in themselves or others and it may help them save themselves, a friend, a loved one, a co-worker, a brother, anyone.
It is also my hope that someone will fall in love with my brother. His writing is insightful and humorous, albeit snarky humor (not to everyone’s taste I know) but if someone can learn to understand this beautiful man, his ways and his life and love him I will have succeeded in some way, if in some small way my little brother can touch a complete strangers heart then what I’m doing will mean something.
© 2015 Dead Mans Diaries (S)